I am dying
Husband texts to wife on cell..
“Hi, what r u doing Darling?”
Wife: I’m dying..!
Husband jumps with joy but types “Sweet Heart, how can I live without U?”
Wife: “U idiot! I’m dying my hair..”
Husband: “Bloody English Language!
Angry wife to her husband
An Angry Wife To Her Husband 0n Phone:
“Where d Hell Are You …?”
Husband: Darling You Remember That Jewellery Shop Where You Saw The Diamond Necklace n Totally Fell In Love With It n I Didn’t Have Money That Time n I said “Baby It’ll Be Yours 1 Day … “O:)
Wife, With A Smile & Blushing: Yeah I Remember That My Love!
Husband: I ‘m in the Pub Just Next To That Shop
A Special Package for Business Men.
An Airline Introduced A Special Package For Business Men. Buy Ur Ticket Get Ur Wife’s Ticket Free. After Great Success, The Company Sent Letters To All The Wives Asking How Was The Trip.
All Of Them Gave A Same Reply…”Which Trip?”
Cool Msg by a woman:
Dear Mother-in-law, “Don’t Teach me how 2 handle my children, I’m living with one of yours & he needs a lot of improvement”
A Sweet demand by a kid.
A kid was beaten by his mom. Dad came n asked – what happen son?
Kid said-I can’t adjust with your wife anymore, I want my own
I will think about it
When a married man says “I’ll think about it”,
What he really means that, He doesn’t know his wife’s opinion yet..
Habit of talking in sleep
A Lady to Doctor:
My husband has habit of talking in sleep! what shud i give him to cure?
Dr: Give him an Opportunity to speak wen hez awake
Head & Neck of the family
It is said that Husband is the head of the family, but remember that wife is the Neck of the family & the Neck can turn the Head exactly the way she wants.
Do you want dinner?
Wife: Do you want dinner?
Husband: Sure, what are my choices?
Wife: Yes and no.
What is the Difference between Mother & Wife?
A – One Woman Brings U into this world crying… & the other ensures U Continue to do so.
To whom do you owe your success as a millionaire
Interviewer to Millionaire: To whom do you owe your success as a millionaire?”
Millionaire: “I owe everything to my wife.”
Interviewer: “Wow, she must be some woman.
Interviewer: “What were you before you married her?”
Millionaire: “A Billionaire”
Wife wish 2 be a newspaper
Wife: I wish I was a newspaper so I would be in ur hands all day.
Husband: I too wish that u were a newspaper so I could have a new one every day.
Can I make a call to my wife?
A man in Hell asked Devil:
Can I make a call to my Wife?
After making call he asked how much to pay.
Devil: Nothing, Hell to hell is Free.
NATURAL DISASTERS JUST HAPPEN
Nobody teaches Volcanoes to erupt, Tsunamis to devastate, Hurricanes to sway around & no one teaches How to choose a Wife,
NATURAL DISASTERS JUST HAPPEN.